Tuesday, July 17, 2012

Pretending is better than hurting?

Someone once whispered to me:

 "Pretending is better than hurting"

I turned up my face, looking into her eyes. "Why did you say like that, huh? Is somethings happen?"

please, do something!

Then, she told me a story of her life, her experiences to be precise.. Her story, full of sadness, happiness, disappointment and motivation. I listened carefully without interrupting her words.. I didn't get surprised with everything she just said, and the first 'wisdom' earlier from her mouth. I'm pity her, and I don't wish to have the same stories like her. But I do try, be in her shoes.

you're not okay, right?

I'm looking deeply to her face, grab both of her hand, hoping that I can supply some strength, then, I put my hand around her neck and give a hug, and say: "Please, don't get hurt again. Stop pretending not to see anything. Because for me, when I'm pretending, I will become more hurting. My wound inside my heart will become deeper and I'm afraid that I cannot help myself to start hating. I don't want the love you synergized yesterday end up with the hatred tomorrow."

sharing is really helpful,, why don't you try?

Both of us keep silence. I only heard the wind blows slowly, without any song from the birds. Suddenly, I heard the crying. I know it hers. I can feel the burden she had for a while. I cannot imagined how if it is me. Can I be like her, become so strong? And smile even if she is hurting so much? My eyes now is watering so bad, and not a second passes, the tears just falling slowly.. Then we cried together. She has been sooo strong and be patient for the time being and for sure, for a long time I guess. Let her let go all those bad feeling, disappointed, and distress before.

Try to be like her. No matter how much she feel so bad about her problems or feelings, she just be patient and put trust to Allah. She always pray that because Allah always knows what's better for her, lets Allah's plan her everyday.. She just wanna smile, don't wanna burdening others, and make everyone surround her happy. As long as it is all about happiness, she can take it..


Don't make me falling into that kind of emotion for the second time!
I'm afraid I can't stay still. It's very bad when hurting, feels like the heart is going to burst out.


What is this post all about?
Hmm, please make your own assumption, and don't ask me. I will not say anything.
This is a true story,, so to all readers, don't hurt yourself by pretending, okay?

...May Allah Bless...

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